.the soothing sound of the swing.

We went to the park recently, just down the road a bit. It was a nice little "get out of the house" moment. Malachi LOVEd the swing. He was so cute and content. I tried to capture the moment. Of course, while this was occurring, there were 3 other monkeys on the loose. Oh well, I did find them eventually.

Gotta love the squealing sound in the background.


Ati had to try it out, too


Why wear shoes? I just can't seem to keep them on this kid..

The rains came down, and the floods came up…

…and the house, and the sand, washed away. Yep, true story, it actually does happen, in real life.
Who would’ve thought that living on a mountain would put you in danger of flooding- from sudden and unexpected tidal waves of pouring rain? I know that I sure didn’t think so. Logically-my logic at least-the rain would run along and flow happily by, and down the mountain; just like that OTHER primary song “give said the little stream, as it HurrIED, DOWN the HiLL”.
Apparently, in real life, if you aren’t at the very tip top of the mountain-and especially if you have uphill facing window wells-you are still in the at risk category of possible flooding-due to sudden and unexpected tidal waves of pouring rain.
The story goes like this:
The unusually rainy weather we’ve been having has oversaturated the ground with water; naturally.
Saturday afternoon we had a very sudden down pour of rain. It was CRAZY rain! Out of nowhere! I don’t know about the valley, but at least up here on the mountain we got it good.
Not being at the TOP of the mountain proved to be a disadvantage, and apparently all the water that fell on our uphill neighbors had to HURRY DOWN the HILL-taking with it everything in its path.
Of course, it didn’t just TAKE everything, some things it did leave. Like the sudden and unexpected-but yet temporary- aquariums in our uphill facing basement windows. That was a pleasant surprise. And, unlike those fancy store-bought aquariums that everyone wants in their offices, these ones were undesirable, far from water tight, and definitely not filled with pretty fishes. Our new-and temporary-aquariums were filled with mud and bugs. We then experienced further enjoyment as the water seeped through the very non-energy-efficient windows, down the walls, and across the carpet.
Fortunately, we are no strangers to flooded basements. So, although it was very unpleasant, irritating, and discouraging, the actual flooding was definitely not a new experience. The new experience, however, was that of OCEANs pouring down the mountain. Previous flooding has always been related to other various, and unnecessary, situation: like not having rain gutters, overwatering plants against the house, busted water heaters, broken hoses on the washing machine, cracked drain pipe from the dishwasher, eroded tile in the upstairs shower, broken toilet seals in the upstairs toilet, etc, and so on. Yes, this was a new one to add to the list of “how to flood your house” (maybe I’ll write a book: “house flooding for dummies).
It’s been a while since we’ve had a good flood, so it was sadly discouraging; something, also, to add to the list of “why NOT to buy THIS house”.
So, it rained really hard, there was a lot of water, and a raging river developed. It came down the mountain, through the neighbor’s garage, and straight down our drive way. I guess it’s pretty silly to have a house built on a down slope from the street. Somehow water filled up the window wells, miraculously didn’t even go under the garage, and then rushed around to the backyard.
It took with it layers of mulch from along the fence, and continued right across our once lovely sand box; leaving ribbons of mulch throughout the sand. The raging river proceeded to wash large amounts of sand into our downhill neighbors’ yard. All my garden boxes flooded, the grape vines were peeled off the fence that was supporting most of their weight, and the new tree rings that I had just tilled and fertilized were filled and spilled.
Luckily there were only two rooms in the house that flooded. One of which is an unfinished food storage room, so there was minimal damage there, and most of the water drained into the concrete floor. But the water that came in through that room initially spread to the next room over and seeped through the wall. The next room over happens to be Ati’s room; the second room that flooded through the window.
So, unfortunately Ati’s room got it the worst; and Ati is not one capable of handling her emotions in any type of stressful situation. The water came in so fast that it poured over the window ledge and down the wall. It also flowed straight down, behind the sheetrock, soaking the insulation and spreading further sideways along the wall. It soaked her curtain, her pictures on the wall, and about two feet out onto the carpet. She had a dresser and bookshelf against the wall that have water damage on the bottom. Also, the closet is full of water where the storage room leaked through.
Because water damage is not a new thing to this house, we decided to just dry it out and move on (In any other house we would replace the dry wall and insulation, and replace the carpet-but who’s to say it won’t just happen again? and there’s so many other repairs to spend the money on). We moved Ati out of her room, cleaned the window sill and wall, and ripped up the carpet. There is a fan blowing on it around the clock. It’s starting to stink like mildew, and it’s really bothersome to live with. We keep spraying it with Lysol and leave the windows cracked to ventilate better.





It may or may not be getting better, but we’re expecting it to take a while to completely dry out. We may end up replacing the damaged drywall and insulation anyway, because we happen to have some material left from previous projects. It wouldn't be too difficult, it’ll just be a matter of getting around to it.
In the meantime, Ati is sleeping in Tad’s bed and Tad is sleeping in the family room. It took a bit of adjusting at first, but now it seems to work out alright. Ati was very emotional and displaced when the flooding first happened. Until she was told she could sleep in Tads bed (which was very exciting for her) she was an emotional train wreck: freaking out, screaming and crying about everything. Giving her something new and fun to focus on seemed to calm her down, at least initially. We’ve talked about just moving her into Tads room permanently, after everything’s put back together. She likes the idea, but she’ll be sharing the room with Eli and we haven’t quite decided if it will work or not. This is our test run. It would probably be good for her to learn to share a room; she’s always had sleeping problems and had to have her own room. She seems to be sleeping better most of the time, so it might be ok to at least try it out. The other possible problem with putting her back in her old room is the fear of being flooded again. She’d have a hard time getting over it, and it may cause further trauma for her.
It turns out we weren’t the only ones to be affected by the storm. Quite a lot of the town had flooding of some kind or other, but I’ve been surprised to hear about all the homes that actually had indoor flooding. At first I just assumed that it was just our house because there is EVERYthing wrong with our house, and it is ALways flooding and damaged in some way. I slowly learned of damage to our friends and neighbors, but then I heard that there was a lot of complaining at the city council meeting last night about homes being damaged. People want the city to install drainage systems. That would be great, but who knows if it will actually happen.
It's funny how something so unexpected can sneak up on you and then permanently change life; not only the way you live, but also the way you think. We went from having a slightly rainy, yet pleasant, afternoon, to experiencing a natural disaster (even though it was only a small scale disaster). It causes one to reevaluate planning and preparedness, to feel sadness and frustration, and to appreciate that: “it could've been worse".

Scrapbooking...hmm...Let's go Digital!

I've thought about-and on occassion attempted-traditional scrapbooking. But, I really just can't be bothered with it. It seems to take so much time, space, and money!

Just been playing around, but here's an attempt at the digital version...who knows, maybe it'll be a new time gobbling obsession...

...yay for time gobbling obsessions!

Edited to Include:
One more, for good measure...or because I just can't stop!

Weaners BEWARE.

This last year has been a really good one for me, physically and emotionally. I’ve been more happy and more healthy, more often.
Strangely, over the last month and a half to two months I’ve been way “off”. Things just haven’t been right, and they’ve been slowly and progressively getting worse.
At first I blamed it on all the projects we’ve been working on and just being exhausted from that. Then, I thought maybe it had to do with school being out and having all the kids home all the time; added to the already exhaustness of too many projects. When preschool ended, a week or two before elementary school got out, I also stopped exercising as often because I couldn’t go walking while Ati was in school; just had too many babies at home. So, being overworked, over kidded, and under exercised made a good excuse for a recipe of depression; sort of.
Then, the last two weeks have been extremely hard, to the point of me wondering “what’s the point?” of anything. I‘ve been so tired, so down, and soo unmotivated.
I started a new form of birth control about 2 weeks ago; Nuvaring. It’s hormonal, which I hate, but my doctor recommended it because it’s a lower dose of hormones and supposedly women who have trouble finding the right kind of pill do really well with the ring. So, I was excited to try it out. Well, almost immediately after starting it was when things got really low for me. I could hardly get out of bed, really moody all day: angry, sad, frustrated, anxious.
Of course, after several days of things not “letting up” I began to question and research and then blame the ring for my “depression”. Except, it didn’t make complete sense because this had already begun building (although I was unaware at the time), even before starting the new hormones. I only last night realized that it had been building, and until that sudden realization was completely blaming the birth control for my “issues”. I was still being optimistic, however, and decided I would give it a month or two to let my body adjust to the change. I realized it would probably, hopefully, only be temporary and that I would be ok after a while. Unfortunately I have read many horror stories of women who put up with depression for years, being on hormonal birth control, and finally had to quit the hormones to regain any amount of mental stability. So, with that in the back of my mind, ive been optimistic but also skeptical and doubting. I’ve had a terrible time going back and forth, trying to figure out what I want to do for birth control. If my body can’t handle the hormones there are very few other options. SUCH a difficult decision to make.
Well, with all that said, interestingly enough, I had a realization last night. When john and I were talking about it, he mentioned that he can tell when I’m not doing well because of “what we have for dinner”. That’s when I thought back and realized we’ve eaten a whole lot of macaroni lately! Ramen, sandwiches, chicken nuggets, and take out. Those have all been the main focus of our menu for quite some time now. Over the last month and a half, or so, I’ve put effort (and only minimal at that) into dinner maybe 2-3 times. That’s how I know it’s not (just) the birth control.
So, my little, slightly defective brain started dusting off some cobwebs and put a few things together. One major factor that I forgot to factor because I didn’t realize it was so MAJOR: I’ve been gradually weaning Malachi (from breastfeeding, of course)! The last month and a half has been the most dramatic. I went from 4-5 feedings a day to just 2, to just one, and then finally, the day before I started the new birth control was my very last time. So! There it is! Weaning can cause similar effects to PPD (post partum depression). I did a lot of reading about it since that realization, and have found that it is actually quite common, and totally makes sense! When you’re breastfeeding your body produces large amounts of oxytocin, a chemical/hormone that causes your body to relax and feel calm (among other things). Even a gradual weaning will cause lower levels of oxytocin, and various hormonal changes in the body. A breastfeeding body is still a breastfeeding body, no matter how often or little you are nursing.
Coincidentally, I: 1. Completely weaned, 2. Started a brand new form of hormone, and 3. Started my period (for the first time in over 2 years)… all on the Exact Same Day. Talk about hormone overload!
Happily, now that I’ve sufficiently self diagnosed my condition I can now go on my way to recovery from my hormone addiction/imbalance. It’s funny how just realizing what the problem is can make a huge world of difference. Today, I already feel so much better. More energy, optimism, and motivation (still irritable and emotional, but we can’t ask for everything, can we?). Of course, it’ll probably take a while to get back to feeling “right”, but I’m at least on the way. And then there are still those “other” issues, like kids being home from school; just the thought of that is exhausting.
In conclusion, as I say “Weaners BEWARE”. You may experience an unusual and unexplained amount of tiredness, sad feelings, unmotivation, pointlessness, and just all around “not rightness” (not to mention increased amounts of time on the internet, doing pointless, obsessive, and never ending research). But, it’s ok, and it’s (probably) normal, and it will (probably) go away.

*It all adds up:

With this being my 4th baby, I was wondering why I’ve never realized this in the past. Well, I believe I have. After Tad was born, I only nursed him for around 10 days, so any depression was blamed on normal PPD. Ati nursed for 1 year, but just after she turned a year we moved. During the weaning process I blamed it on being exhausted from moving, and other life things. But, at that exact time I was really depressed, unmotivated, and so so tired, all the time. I remember once I finally started to exercise and actually feel better was when I got pregnant with Eli. Then, Eli nursed for a year, but I was actually pregnant with Malachi when I decided to wean him. So, I of course blamed any and all issues at that time on the new pregnancy.
There you have it, case solved! Yay, now let’s all eat cake!

We ALL need Olive Fingers...

...don't ya think!




Malachi's first experience with olives. I thought I should educate him on proper olive etiquette. He sat in amazement and marveled over his new discovery.

"Partial" Family Pictures

It's so hard to get everyone together in one picture. Here are some "partial" family pictures from April (2009), when we took a trip up to Salt Lake to visit Temple Square. It was a really nice, fun day-and the best part was it cost almost nothing (except food of course-and ice cream!)

Sweat and Sand

Where have I been? Gosh, I don’t even know. I guess I turned 30 and entered a whole new chapter of life; or something like that. A lot has happened in the last 6 months, but I don’t even know where to begin. So I’ll start with the most recent.
We are just about finished with a project we started many years ago: the yard! Of course, it’ll always be a work in progress, but now we at least have something to work on. Several years ago we ripped out a whole bunch of dead trees and hauled off tons of garbage. Two years ago we installed a sprinkler system and completed the front yard. It’s been really nice to at least have a small piece of yard for the kids, but it’s hard to keep a constant eye on them in the front yard, with no fences. Any time they wanted to play outside I had to be right there with them. Finally, over the last few weeks we’ve completed the back yard, and even finished fencing it in!






The fence, I think, is my absolute favorite part.





But, the rest is pretty great too. We’ve got a pretty large lawn surrounded by nice curbing. There is a border around the yard of crushed rock, and dark mulch. We have the garden boxes along the back fence,




really old grape vines that we were able to save,



and the best part-aside from the fence-is a HUGE sand box. It’s really, really cool.




We’ve got our bbq in the back now-instead of the garage- up against the house, and a small deck that we actually want to use now.



I’ve made a personal mission of eliminating all wasps, and seem to be controlling it pretty good. I can’t get rid of them all, but at least they don’t attack anymore and we can eat outside, mostly in peace. We planted a couple little trees that aren’t doing anything yet, but were excited about them. I even got me a little peach tree. We were able to save some iris’s that had previously been in the yard and I planted them along one of the side fences. I have a strawberry patch along the other fence; I think it’ll be lots of fun, as long as the birds don’t eat them all. The last 3 years I’ve had to anguish over deer eating everything, but now with my fence up I can no longer blame the deer. I might actually be able to find out if I can really grow anything or not; but, with the birds, I’ll still have something to blame if it doesn’t work out, hehe.





Well, we’re super excited about our new yard. It makes it so much nicer here. I think having a yard also gives me a few extra minutes to myself; but of course I spend my extra time outside with the kids anyway.
Just before the yard project we had been working on an interior remodeling project. We added an extra bedroom in the basement. That was really cool and exciting too. But, it was a huge project and left everything displaced for a few months while we had construction garbage and tools everywhere. Quit a pain trying to keep the kids out of it. It’s so nice to be done and to look back at all we’ve done. We started with a somewhat oddly sized bedroom that had a very large storage closet attached. The storage room was almost big enough to use as a small nursery, but the only entrance was through the other bedroom. Because of wiring and framing there wasn’t a place to put a door to the room from the hall, so we decided to move the wall between the two rooms and make room for a separate entrance. It was a lot more work then I had expected! We had to tear down the wall, rip up carpet,





rewire, rebuild the wall, move one door way and add another; then, finish the new room because it had been left unfinished when it was a storage room. So, we installed insulation, put up drywall, mud and tape, wall texture, and then paint.




We didn’t install carpet, but we had a large area rug and some scraps from the other room that we pieced together to complete the floor covering. Someday we’ll add carpet? Who knows, there’s so much to do here. We could spend $100k on this house, just to fix it up. But, at least it’s a good place to live, we have what we need, we do what we can.
We really don’t even know what the future will bring. We’d like to stay here long term, but that’s going to completely depend on Johns work. He has about a year left until he gets his degree, then we hope he’ll get a better paying job. The sky’s the limit with that though; it could be anything, anywhere. Even with his current job he has a potential advancement opportunity, that may be soon, but will almost definitely require us to relocate to somewhere else in the county-could be anywhere. We wouldn’t know where until he was offered the job.
Ironically, I’d be sad to move. Our original plan-3 years ago-was to only be here long enough to fix up the house just enough to sell it. Then, time went by, and it was looking like we’d be here a lot longer. I was really depressed for a while when I felt that things weren’t going to change. I’ve been more optimistic about things now, and have actually decided that we could be happy here. We would buy the house ourselves and it would be ours, and we would make it nice. I think I’ve been fighting the fact that I live here. Until recently I’ve been living in “someone else’s” house, just until something else came along. But, now I realize this is my house too, and it’s ok to make it nice, even if I won’t be the one to stay here. It’s ok to make it nice for the “next person”, and to enjoy it while I’m here. Strangely, just changing my perspective and attitude has made a huge difference in the way I live my life.
We’re all pretty exhausted now. It’s been a long haul, and we’re ready for a break. We still have a few little things to tie up on our recent projects that sadly may never get done. The other side of the new wall we built still needs mud, tape, texture and paint,




and a few other misc things in the yard. But, we’re ready for a break, and to enjoy our work, and to enjoy the summer.

Here's our most recent family picture, we went to the Aquarium:


And, some random pictures of the kids:

The Aaah!gonizing Fax

Who would’ve thought that sending a fax could be so painful?
It started out as a simple idea, just running an errand. I needed to send a fax, and found out last night that my fax machine is no longer compatible with the phone service; because we recently switched to Comcast. So, this morning I got ready to go out, gathered up all the kids and headed for the DWS to use the fax machine there. Of course, as soon as I pulled out of the drive way Ati was starving; never mind the fact that she was at that moment eating some fruit snacks. Then, a little while later (while still whining about being starving) she was hot. I pretty much ignored her whining and went on my way. We got to DWS and had to wait just a few minutes for someone else to finish with the fax machine; no problem. Then, it was my turn. I put my fax in, and it was too big. So, I had to split it in half; ok, not a big deal. I dialed the number, and waited…and waited…and waited. The fax would not go through. It redialed 6 times, and then spit out a report that said the number was busy. I tried it again. Same thing. Third time, still busy. By then it had be at least 30 minutes of waiting for the fax to go through, I was getting extremely anxious and frustrated. In the meantime, Malachi decided he was tired (it was his naptime) so he was crying, Eli had pooed and was really stinky, Ati and Eli both had their shoes off and Eli took his shirt off. They were both running around the building in circles, while laughing and squealing really loudly. During my first attempts of faxing I was also having trouble with the machine pulling multiple pages through at once, so that of course made it even more annoying. Well, after being extremely annoyed, and having annoying kids, I finally realized that I had been doing it wrong! I was supposed to dial 9 to get out of the building! Who would’ve known that?! (who except for all the people who actually read the directions, that were in big print, taped to the desk, right next to the fax machine!) What a relief, though, because it meant I was just an idiot and the machine was fine and I could be almost done…relieving except that I felt like a big idiot, my kids were still being really crazy, and there were people waiting to use the fax machine. There was a lady (not in line, but just there, watching) holding a baby that I assume was her grandson, who was giving me pretty dirty looks. She seemed to be thinking that “some people shouldn’t have so many kids” (of course, I don’t really know what she was thinking, that’s just how she looked).
So, anyway, I put my first fax back in, followed the directions, and only had a slight problem when 2 sheets tried to go through at one time; the fax went through! On to the next fax. The first few pages went fine, then the machine jammed! I don’t even know what happened, just that I was annoyed. So, it spit out a report that said “jammed”. Grrr. I gathered up the pages that seemed to have gone through, and quickly shoved the rest in the machine, for hopefully one final fax. My fax cover sheets were all wrong because of the amount of pages, and I probably double faxed a few things; but, I still don’t even know if the 2nd fax actually went through (the one that said jammed). I hurried and got out of the way so the guy behind me (who was in a hurry) could take his turn. Ati had been bugging me about needing to go potty, so I rounded up their shoes, grabbed the crying Malachi and rushed to the bathroom. Eli was left behind screaming because he couldn’t get his shoe on and didn’t want to be left. I grabbed his shoes and had him put them on in the bathroom. I was going to change his diaper because he was really starting to stink up the place, but I didn’t bring the diaper bag in (it was only going to be a quick fax). So, I left the kids alone in the bathroom (just for 20 seconds) and ran to get the diapers from the car. Of course, in the 20 seconds I was gone another lady (the one giving me dirty looks) had to use the bathroom, but my kids had locked themselves in the stalls, and there was no room for her. She was visibly annoyed, but just left while we were in there. I put Eli on the changer, started to take off his diaper, and found out: no wipies! Ugh! So, I improvised and quickly ran to the sink to wet some paper towels. It worked ok. When we were done in the bathroom I thought I would quickly try to refax the 2nd fax, just to be sure...haha, yea right! As soon as I got to the fax machine again Malachi was crying, Ati was starving and thirsty, and Eli was just running around. I gave up. We left. Had to chase Eli around the car a bit, but finally got him buckled, and pulled out of the parking lot. Phew, glad that was over.

The Smell of Fresh Baked Bread…and poo!

It’s so great having a second car. I can go and run errands, and leave the house just for the sake of leaving the house. I am much enjoying it. Yesterday, while out on my walk, a friend of mine mentioned that she makes bread dough in her bread machine and then bakes it in the oven;for some reason that idea was such a revelation to me. I’ve been wanting to make bread, but haven’t gotten to the point of deciding to put in all the effort it requires. So, the idea of having the bread machine do all the work for me, but then being able to put it in the oven and not have that funky shape with the hole in the middle (from baking in the bread machine), just made me so excited. I went right away and found my bread machine in our storage. I also found some other fun things in the box with the bread maker: the Salad King (salad shredder), an electric chopper, and the popcorn machine. Now I need to go buy some popcorn, so we can play.
Today I started a loaf of whole wheat bread. I’m actually doing the whole thing in the bread machine because I just feel a little crazy with all the kids, but I want fresh baked bread. I will eventually work up to the part where I bake it in the oven, but just not today. I’m also really excited because I got a bunch of recipes to do other things, like cinnamon rolls, dinner rolls, and pizza dough. It’ll be fun! (I hope)
Well, of course, while I was busy on the computer looking for recipes I tried as long as I could to ignore the offending smell of poo. Ati and Eli were watching a movie, while playing with legos and I knew (from the smell) that Eli needed his diaper changed. Unfortunately, I waited too long, and he was finally telling me that he had poo on his hand! I immediately stopped what I was doing and ran to assess the damage. He had leaked on a tote, some legos, the floor, and had proceeded to step in it and get it somehow on his hands and toy fishing pole. From stepping in it and then walking around, his feet and legs were covered in poo. Long story short, I cleaned it up…and now, along with the fresh smell of baked bread, I also smell poo, and berry air freshener…yum!

We Survived!...i think?

What a relief, I think we’re mostly done; other than a few lingering side effects. Every one of us ended up getting sick, to some degree. It’s interesting, though, because we all had different levels of severity. Surprisingly, Malachi was on the very mild end, if he really even had it.
So, to conclude this chapter of the story, here is a summary of the last few days:
Friday, Halloween, Ati woke up feeling “all the way better”, or so she said. I was still pretty skeptical, considering that she was near death (not really, just seemed that way) the day before. I’m pretty sure she was mustering up all her strength to feel better so that she wouldn’t miss her Halloween party at school (or trick or treating, of course). I ended up letting her go to school, but just for the parade, and then I was going to take her home. Well, she talked me into letting her stay for the party; and I sat by the phone practically the whole time expecting to hear that she’d thrown up or passed out. She actually made it through the whole thing, and did just fine. Of course, when she got home she was immediately cranky, and went back to lying around in her underwear. I think she just wore herself out and was still fighting the final battle of sick. She was still pretty weak the rest of the day, but managed to enjoy all the Halloween fun. Saturday and Sunday were similar, she was mostly better but still weak; and then Monday she woke up full of energy and ready to be alive again.
Eli was completely better on Friday, making his grand total of sick days: 6
Friday, however, was the beginning of the fun for the rest of us. To spare the boring details of it, I will summarize: Tad, Malachi, John and I all ended up with (the D word). Malachi threw up on Sunday, but only 1 time, and he only had (the D word) on Friday. I’ve been really achy, nauseous, weak, and tired since Friday, but I was still able to function (mostly). Today I’m starting to feel almost better. I’m not quite 100 percent, but getting there).
So, there you have it…The End!

A few other things of interest:

We finally have some extra money to fix up our old black van. It’s still a slow process, but within the next few weeks we will have a second car to drive! Yay!

We made a big decision:
We are going to buy (or build) our own home! Without the in-laws! We looked through our budget, and with John’s new job we hope to have our debt paid off sometime in the spring, which will free up some money to start thinking about moving out! There’s a lot more details about that whole situation and a lot more to be worked out; but I’m just really excited and immensely relieved! Until now we have had no plan for the future, and life here was becoming rather gloomy. Now I can smile and see the light.

And…Today is Tad’s birthday…he is 9! Crazy how time goes by.

Here are some random pictures from the last few days:

My Flowers Blooming



A Pretty Sunrise, in the backyard



Ati at her Halloween Parade (in the white dress)


More Halloween Fun